The Adventures Of Baby Stegoceratops
by Lord Kristine
Summary: Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them.
1. Baby Stegoceratops Takes A Bath

Baby stegoceratops is nervous. She has never taken a bath before, and it looks scary. There is frothy white stuff in the water, which is strange. When baby stegoceratops turns around, however, she sees that her mother is giving her an encouraging smile. Baby stegoceratops waddles towards the bucket and dips her toe in the water. She quickly shakes it off. The water feels different. Warm.

Before she can run away, her mother picks her up with her beak. She lowers baby stegoceratops into the water. Baby stegoceratops splashes around for a bit before she gets bored. The white foam, she notices, makes floaty things that hover in front of her face. She pops them with her front horn, very pleased with herself. One particularly large floaty thing sprays mist in her eyes. Baby stegoceratops begins to cry. The mist stings. Her mother leans in and nudges her with her beak. Baby stegoceratops grabs her face with her stubby little feet and moos plaintively. Her mother licks her cheek, and she feels better.

Baby stegoceratops is very displeased when her mother dumps water over her head. She does not like getting her frill wet, and the water is getting colder. Even worse, her mother is using a scratchy brush to scrub her. It feels like hay. Baby stegoceratops much prefers the little white bar that makes foam. It's slippery, and she likes to slide it around.

Her mother pulls her out of the tub and places her on the ground, covering her with a towel. Baby stegoceratops crawls into it, pretending to be a bear in a cave. She curls her tail under the towel and squeaks. Her mother peeks through the front. Baby stegoceratops bumps her nose. She smiles.

When baby stegoceratops is dry, her mother empties the bucket. She puts the brush away, but she can't find the soap. She looks in the sink and under the counter, but it is nowhere to be found. And then, she solves the mystery.

Baby stegoceratops is burping up bubbles.


	2. Baby Stegoceratops Eats Lunch

Baby stegoceratops does not like carrots. They are mushy, orange, and gross. She glares at them angrily. She is sitting in her highchair with her arms crossed, fed up with the whole thing. He mother is starting to get frustrated. She leans over the high chair and grabs a little spoon. Scooping up some of the carrot mush, she holds the spoon in front of baby stegoceratops' face. Baby stegoceratops turns her head.

Her father is getting involved now. He makes funny little noises, trying to get her to open her mouth. Baby stegoceratops punches her mashed potatoes, splattering them on the wall. Her mother frowns and grabs a cloth.

Baby stegoceratops has a brilliant idea. If her carrots are on the wall too, they won't be in her mouth. She lifts her fist, but her father holds her back. He tickles her belly and she squeals happily. She soon realizes that it was a trick. Her mother puts a spoonful of carrots in her mouth. Baby stegoceratops grimaces. Her mother gives her a warning frown. Baby stegoceratops crinkles her nose and swallows the carrots.

Her father is making funny faces. He sticks out his tongue and crosses his eyes. Baby stegoceratops laughs. It was another trick! Her mother shoves a spoonful of carrots in her mouth. Baby stegoceratops swallows them and frowns deeply, her brow creasing.

Her father tugs at the sides of his mouth and makes goofy noises. Baby stegoceratops refuses to laugh. She glares at him with a burning hatred. He pokes her nose, but she remains firm. He is discouraged.

Just when it seems like he's going to pull another stunt, her father shrugs and picks up her baby plate. He scoops up some carrots and lifts the spoon towards his mouth very slowly. Baby stegoceratops squeals and reaches out in agony. Her father smiles and places the plate in front of her. She laps up her meal quickly.

Nobody steals her carrots.


	3. Baby Stegoceratops Makes A Friend

Baby stegoceratops is stuck in her crib. There is nothing to explore behind bars, and she doesn't even have a blanket to play with. She flops on her back and looks up at the spinning animals. They are always turning above her head, smiling down at her with dopey expressions. There's a blue animal with a long neck and tail, a purple animal with a dome-head, a green animal with big thumbs, and a red animal with sharp teeth. She doesn't like that one.

Baby stegoceratops rolls over and kicks the wooden bars. They make a clinky-clanky sound. She tries to stick her foot through the gaps, but it is too big. She moos unhappily. Baby stegoceratops is determined to get out. She has seen her mother lower the wall by poking a small clasp on the side of the crib. If she can reach that clasp, she will be free.

Baby stegoceratops stands on her hind legs, keeping her front feet pressed against the bars for balance. She lifts her head and tries to nudge the clasp. She is lucky to have a soft beak like her father, because it makes it easy to stick her face between the bars. She reaches forward desperately. Even squished all the way, her beak isn't long enough to reach the clasp. Baby stegoceratops sticks out her tongue. She runs it along the white plastic, trying to set herself free.

Suddenly, baby stegoceratops hears voices. Pulling her face out of the bars, she lies on her side and closes her eyes. Her parents enter the room. They are carrying a strange animal. Her father shakes the animal in front of her face and makes funny sounds. Baby stegoceratops leans away in fear. Her father places the animal in the crib and joins her mother outside. Baby stegoceratops is alone.

The animal is slouched forward. It is white with black spots, and it has a funny pink thing on its belly. It doesn't seem to be moving. It just stares at her with black button eyes. Baby stegoceratops decides to introduce herself. She struts over to the animal and bumps it with her horn. The animal does not respond. Baby stegoceratops frowns and bumps him harder. He falls forward, and baby stegoceratops runs away. The animal is clearly hostile.

Baby stegoceratops sits in the corner of her crib for a long time. She stares at the animal, who has not moved since it attacked her. She stares and stares and stares, but nothing happens. Maybe the animal is asleep. Slowly, baby stegoceratops scoots closer to her cribmate. It sits still, not moving a muscle. When she lies down beside it, it leans against her.

Baby stegoceratops likes this new animal.


	4. Baby Stegoceratops Meets The Scary Thing

Baby stegoceratops is playing in the grass. She shakes her new friend up and down, making him jump over flowers and rocks. She has decided that this must be a new kind of stegoceratops. There's the four-legged kind, like baby stegoceratops and her mother, the two-legged kind, like her father, and now this third kind; a funny black and white animal with horns and a pink-thing.

Baby stegoceratops is used to seeing other stegoceratopses. Her mother is speaking with one now. It's the two-legged female with fluffy things on her back. Baby stegoceratops wonders why her father doesn't have fluffy things. Maybe only two-legged females have them.

Baby stegoceratops gets a little nervous when she sees the scary thing. The fluffy-back female has brought him along, and whatever he is, he is _not_ a stegoceratops. He stands on two legs, but he leans forward like a four-legged stegoceratops. He is covered in yellow fluffy-stuff, but he looks dangerous. The sharp things on his toes frighten baby stegoceratops.

To her horror, the scary thing runs over. He is fast, very fast, and he makes funny sounds. When he gets closer, baby stegoceratops notices that he has sharp teeth. He reminds her of the red animal on her mobile.

The scary thing shows his teeth, and baby stegoceratops backs away. The scary thing sits down in front of her. He rolls onto his back. When baby stegoceratops sees the sharp things on his feet, she squeals and runs away. The scary thing follows her, but he is soon scooped up by the fluffy-back stegoceratops. She scolds him, and he says something to her. Baby stegoceratops is glad that he is being restrained.

Baby stegoceratops waddles over to her mother, who picks her up and holds her against her chest. She likes it when it's just her and her mother. The other stegoceratopses make her nervous. Some of them are friendly, like the one with the long face and flappy arm-things, but she doesn't trust anyone who would carry a scary thing around with them.

Baby stegoceratops wonders about many things. She wonders about what kind of food she's going to eat and what kind of games she's going to play, but now she's starting to wonder about something else. Why are stegoceratopses so different? Baby stegoceratops looks like her mother, even though she has a soft beak, beige skin, and lumpy plates. The fluffy-back stegoceratops looks very different from either of them. As a matter of fact, so does her father. Baby stegoceratops wonders about this, but she can't solve this puzzling enigma.

She soon sees a butterfly, however, and forgets all about it.


	5. Baby Stegoceratops Watches A Movie

Baby stegoceratops is in the living room with her father. Her mother is busy cleaning her room, more so than usual for some reason, and baby stegoceratops is being kept occupied with Winnie the Pooh. She watches the screen flicker, her little tail wagging behind her.

Then something terrible happens. Winnie the Pooh starts to end.

Baby stegoceratops has seen Winnie the Pooh end before. She knows that it's almost over when Christopher Robin starts to talk with Pooh in a serious tone. But this is unacceptable! Winnie the Pooh can't end! She won't allow it.

Baby stegoceratops turns to her father and gets his attention. Slowly, she lifts her foot and points at the TV. He smiles. He doesn't understand.

It's getting closer to the end now. This makes her situation even more dire. Baby stegoceratops jabs her foot in the TV's direction, urging her father to stop Winnie the Pooh from ending. He doesn't seem to know what she wants. He just sits on the couch and shrugs.

Baby stegoceratops turns to the TV and feels her last hopes dying. It's very close to the end now, and she can't take much more of this. Her lower lip begins to quiver, and she feels tears stinging at her eyes. Her father sees this, and kneels down beside her. She looks up at him and points to the TV, making small grunting sounds to tell him what she's upset about. He simply shrugs.

The end music is starting to play now. Baby stegoceratops can feel her defenses melting away. She stares at the TV and starts to hiccup. Then, she cries. Her father tries to calm her down, but to no avail. Winnie the Pooh has ended, and nothing is right in the world. Baby stegoceratops cries and cries and cries.

And then something magical happens. Her father presses a button on the movie machine, and it makes a funny whirring sound. After a moment, her father presses another button. Then, just like magic, Winnie the Pooh is back, and it's started right at the beginning. Baby stegoceratops smiles up at her father, who smiles right back. He picks her up and gives her a hug. Baby stegoceratops punches his cheek affectionately, then sits back down on the carpet.

She has a show to watch.


	6. Baby Stegoceratops Receives A Gift

Baby stegoceratops has figured out why her mother has been so busy lately. The stegoceratops with the flappy arms is coming to visit. She's too big to fit inside the house, so baby stegoceratops must play outdoors. The visitor calls herself Auntie. There's a word after Auntie, but baby stegoceratops can't be bothered to remember it.

To baby stegoceratops' dismay, Auntie is looking after her for a while. She doesn't much like Auntie, because she is loud and enthusiastic and overly-bright. She feels a flicker of hope when she sees that Auntie has brought a gift. Baby stegoceratops tries to open the box, but it's taped shut. Auntie uses her teeth to rip it open. The gift appears to be some sort of bowl.

Baby stegoceratops doesn't know what to do with the strange device. She looks to her parents for guidance, but they don't provide any. Without warning, Auntie places baby stegoceratops on the bowl. That must mean it's a chair. If it is meant to be sat on, it has an odd design. It's not very comfortable, and the bowl part seems absolutely pointless.

Baby stegoceratops tries to climb off of the device, but Auntie picks her up and places her on the seat again. She tickles her belly with her pointy finger-things and smiles. Baby stegoceratops is now convinced that Auntie is an idiot. Her parents must be thinking the same thing, because they are trying to persuade her to reconsider whatever it is she's trying to accomplish. She sasses them with some sort of matter-of-fact argument, and they decide to let it go.

Baby stegoceratops is getting very fed up with the bowl-chair, in the meantime. She wants to go play, but Auntie is insisting that she stays put. Baby stegoceratops is very displeased when she sees her parents leaving. She tries to follow them, but Auntie grabs her and shoves her back on the seat. Baby stegoceratops glowers at her angrily. They sit and stare at each other for a very long time.

When it becomes clear that they are both too stubborn to give up, Auntie begins to preen her arm-flaps. Baby stegoceratops tries to get up when she isn't looking, but is caught every time. Finally, when she can take it no more, baby stegoceratops begins to cry. Auntie sighs and places her on the ground. Baby stegoceratops gives a triumphant grin and waddles away. She's glad that she's finally off of the stupid chair. Had she stayed any longer, she might have accidentally ruined the gift, as senseless as it was to begin with.

This whole time, she really, _really_ had to go to the bathroom.


	7. Baby Stegoceratops Finds A Beetle

Baby stegoceratops has found a beetle. It is blackish-blue, and it moves very slowly. She watches it crawl through the grass, waving its tiny little legs whenever it gets stuck.

Baby stegoceratops decides that she wants it.

Gathering up all of her resources, she builds an enclosure. She takes great care to organize her crayons so that they are at neat angles, then stacks them up in little piles to keep the bug from escaping. When the beetle reaches the fence, however, it crawls right over it.

Baby stegoceratops decides to try a new tactic. She rips up a clump of grass and sets it in front of the beetle. Surely, the bug will stay if she feeds him. But no. It walks right past that too.

Baby stegoceratops is getting frustrated. She's done everything within her power to control the stupid little bug, but it simply won't obey. With a deep scowl, baby stegoceratops punches the beetle to show it how bad it's being. To her horror, when she lifts her foot, she sees a very flat bug. It twitches a little, then stops moving altogether. After a few seconds, baby stegoceratops begins to bawl her eyes out.

Hearing the noise, her father rushes over to see what's the matter. Baby stegoceratops points to the crushed beetle, her lip quivering. Her father rubs his chin, then picks up the bug. He jogs over to the bushes and bends over. After fumbling around for a bit, he returns with the beetle in his palms, perfectly un-crushed. Baby stegoceratops squeals with delight. Her father has saved the beetle, and has even changed the color of its shell to a dark green hue.

Baby stegoceratops lets the beetle crawl over her arm. She has decided that playing with the beetle is much more amusing than simply owning it. She plays and plays and plays until the beetle decides to fly away. She watches it zoom through the air, growing smaller and smaller against the blue sky. A part of her is sad to see it go, but she's also glad that the bug is leaving.

He probably has a family to go home to.


	8. Baby Stegoceratops Plays A Game

Baby stegoceratops does not enjoy being babysat by Auntie. It's true that she can sometimes be fun to play with, but she has very strange ideas about what's fun and what's not. Today, she has decided to play a game of cards and repetition.

Auntie holds up a card with a picture on it and makes the exact same sound over and over and over. Baby stegoceratops watches her with boredom. This game is not very fun.

Auntie starts to get frustrated. Perhaps she has realized that the game she has come up with is not all that good. Maybe she's just getting tired of her dumb rules.

She holds a card in front of baby stegoceratops' face and repeats a certain sound. Her tone is getting harsher.

Luckily, baby stegoceratops' parents come to the rescue. They say something to Auntie, who says something back. She takes out a book and points to a picture of a pink thing that looks like a baby two-leg stegoceratops. Baby stegoceratops is confused. Is she supposed to be acting like the two-leg?

With a determined expression, baby stegoceratops lifts her front feet off of the ground. After a few seconds, she manages to stand upright. She takes one step . . . and falls. Her father comes rushing over to scoop her up. He hugs her tightly as she cries, because he thinks that she is hurt.

But the truth is, she's just disappointed that she failed.


	9. Baby Stegoceratops Learns A Lesson

For a good long time, baby stegoceratops can't help but think things through. She's still disappointed about her failure, but there's something else troubling her. Why was it that Auntie wanted her to be like a two-leg stegoceratops? More importantly, what did this mean about her parents?

Baby stegoceratops knows that her parents love her. They are always there to feed her when she's hungry, heal her when she's hurt, and comfort her when she's upset. Baby stegoceratops is sure that Auntie means well, but her insistence that baby stegoceratops should be like a two-leg is troublesome.

It's true that baby stegoceratops has certain preferences regarding the shapes of her companions (black-and-white stegoceratops is her best friend, yet she would never, ever, _ever_ like the scary thing), but the thought had never occurred to her that maybe her parents had preferences as well. What if they didn't like the way she looked? What if they hated four-legs?

No, that was impossible. Baby stegoceratops' mother is a four-leg, and everyone likes her just fine.

Even so . . .

Baby stegoceratops has noticed a habit of her mother's. She never really thought about it before, but the more she does, the more she wonders.

Her mother has a tendency to sit in front of the mirror for a very long time, not moving, and not saying a word. It's different from the other times she looks at the mirror, like in the morning when she's brushing her teeth or putting on her face-powder. When she gets into a certain mood, she'll sit very still and stare at her reflection for hours on end.

Once or twice, baby stegoceratops' father has caught her mother doing this. He usually guides her away from the mirror, and she gives him a smile that doesn't quite look right. It's all too complicated for baby stegoceratops to understand, but what she _does_ know is that she's supposed to be the best daughter she can be. If something is wrong with her, she'd like to know.

Baby stegoceratops waits until Auntie is asleep. When she's snoring like a chainsaw, baby stegoceratops waddles into the house and climbs up the stairs. It's a difficult journey, but she needs to complete her mission.

Upstairs, baby stegoceratops finds her mother sitting in front of the mirror again. She is so wrapped up in whatever it is she's doing that she doesn't notice baby stegoceratops, at first.

Her mother doesn't move, but her eyes are wet. Slowly, tears slide down her cheeks and hit the floor. Baby stegoceratops flinches as one hits her nose.

When she puts her front foot on her mother's toe, she snaps out of her reverie. She looks down at baby stegoceratops with a strange expression. Not wanting her mother to be upset, baby stegoceratops turns to leave. Her mother picks her up, however, and holds her in front of her face. Baby stegoceratops places her front feet on her mother's beak. They stay that way for a very long time.

"Ma."

Her mother is surprised to hear baby stegoceratops speak. Baby stegoceratops, herself, is a little bit shocked. She did not think she was capable of such things.

Well, whatever the case, her mother seems to be better now. She has turned away from the mirror, and is rocking baby stegoceratops back and forth. She yawns and nuzzles up against her mother, who smiles gently.

Baby stegoceratops does not understand much about the world around her, but she knows enough to get along just fine. She can appreciate her black-and-white friend, she can put up with Auntie, and she can even tolerate carrots once in a while. There are many things that scare baby stegoceratops, but she can overcome them.

As long as her parents love her, nothing else matters.


End file.
